


Kintsugi: The Art of Broken Pieces

by UntimelyAU



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Bird Hybrid TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Happy Ending, Healing, Hurt TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt/Comfort, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Ranboo Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Trauma, Traumatized Toby Smith | Tubbo, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, i really love the headcannon that tommy and sapnap bond, i wanted a healing arc, probably, sapnap is a good guy, so i decided to write it, so im writing it myself, theyll all heal, tomm tubbo and ranboo run away, wooooo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-16 02:07:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29693382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UntimelyAU/pseuds/UntimelyAU
Summary: “Let's run away.”Tommy’s head shot up to stare at his best friend incredulously. Runaway? Was he crazy? Tubbo couldn’t just up and leave, he has responsibilities, a nation to take care of. Though the option tempted Tommy, and he couldn’t help the little buzz in the back of his head at the thought. Getting up and walking away. He could pick up his broken pieces and try to put them back together.------Tommy, Tubbo and Ranboo run away together, and this is the story of how they overcome their past trauma and begin to heal.
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 151





	1. Stay Gold

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, this will be my first full-length DSMP fic, and I'm really excited!  
> I would like to state, however, this takes place before doomsday when L'manburg was blown up for the last time. There are also parts of the SMP that I don't fully understand, such as the Egg. Due to the fact that I don't want to misinterpret any of the lore, or what is to come of it, I will purposely be avoiding that bit of lore in this fic. Sorry if you were curious about that.  
> :(
> 
> Anyways, please enjoy this and let me know what you think by leaving a comment or givng it a kudos, it means a lot!

Tommy didn’t blow up the community house, he knew how much sentiment the building carried. He may be reckless, abrasive, and maybe a little too overly attached to his disks, but he wasn’t an idiot. The community house was a safe place, not so much so as the holy land, but there was still meaning behind the building. It was the longest-standing building on the Server, and he wasn’t the one who placed TNT and blew it up. But what he knew didn’t seem to matter. Everyone was staring at him with disappointed looks. His heart raced as he glanced around the newly destroyed building. People he once called friends were glaring at him, whispering to whoever was standing next to them. What they said, he didn’t know, but the looks on their faces were enough.

He chewed at the skin on his bottom lip. The old Tommy would have loved the attention he was getting. He knew that the old him loved to be in the spotlight whether it was good or bad, but now it was all too overwhelming. His heart leaped to his throat when Dream started talking again, blaming him for something he didn’t do. Tommy didn’t have it in him to argue anymore, taking the shouts as they came. When Technoblade offered to help him get out of there, he denied. He had to speak to Tubbo, and if he left now, he knew would never get another chance. 

Techno had escaped on his own, followed by at least ten people, and Tommy knew he had disappointed the other. He knew he had let the Piglin hybrid down. He knew that when Techno got home, he’d tell Philza about how much of a disgrace he was. He could imagine the look of disappointment on Phil's face or the sound of it in his voice. 

Tommy was only shaken from his thoughts when the shouting at him got louder. The anger that was directed towards him was thick, and the utter looks of betrayal on his former friends' faces, shattered his heart into more pieces than it already was. He looked around at them for a moment before deciding that he couldn’t do so any longer. Instead, he settled on Tubbo.

Tubbo stared back at him, his face unreadable. Whatever he had been thinking at the moment remained a mystery to Tommy. It didn’t matter though, because Tubbo took a step closer to him with an outstretched hand. The blonde nearly shrunk into himself at the action, it reminded him too much of Dream, but then the hand landed on his shoulder. Too close to where his wings were bound to his back. The wings that Tubbo knew existed, but never once outed him for having. His eyes widened as he stared at his short friend, fearing that he may tell everyone here of their existence.

“The bench, Sundown.” Tubbo whispered, only loud enough for Tommy to hear. He flinched away from the boy slightly when he saw him raise his hand, but relaxed as his friend brought it down to rest at his side. His eyes lingered on Tubbos hand for a moment before looking up and locking eyes with the short brunette. Something akin to regret flashed in his eyes before he furrowed his brows and spoke up, his voice loud and practically booming through the remaining crowd of people. “Leave Tommy. I’ve exiled you, I do not want you in this country.”

Tommy’s eyes widened as he stared at his best friend. “What?” He asked in disbelief. Tubbo’s front faltered slightly, and that's when it dawned on Tommy. The other boy was putting on an act in front of the others. He was giving Tommy an out, a chance to leave before things got worse. He’d be a fool not to take it.

The tall blonde didn’t give Tubbo a chance to repeat himself before speaking. “I see…” He muttered, shaking slightly as he turned on his heel, facing away from the young president of L’manburg, and the manipulative man standing behind him. He sucked in a deep breath, and released a shaky one, before beginning to walk away. 

He realizes that he should never have turned his back on Dream, too late. The pain comes quickly, shooting from his shoulder, right above where his wing connected to his back, and down his arm. He trips over his feet slightly, before picking himself back up, using what is left of a wall to steady himself. The gasps from around the crowd shocked him, but he refused to think about it.

He could hear Tubbo shout something from behind him, but he didn’t pay attention to what. A warm liquid dripped down his now rather useless arm, and he really wished he had taken one of the health potions Technblade had offered him the night before. 

“What was that for?!” Someone cried out from the crowd standing atop the building. It was a voice he hadn’t heard in a while, but he definitely knew who it belonged to. Ranboo was someone Tommy would consider a friend. Although it was the prank he had done with the Enderman hybrid that landed him in exile, the other male had never truly abandoned him. Yes, he had stopped visiting in person, but he never failed to leave Tommy comforting letters under his bed. 

“It was a warning shot.” He heard Dream call out, and he could feel the man's eyes glaring at his retreating form. “So he knows what’ll happen if I catch him back here.” He shuddered slightly at the warning. “And you,” Tommy could only assume he was now glaring daggers at the other boy, “If you question me again, you’ll be next.   


That was the last thing Tommy heard before he disappeared behind some trees of the forest. All he had to do now was wait until sundown, where he would have to sneak to where the bench sat, by his old home. 

Slowly, he walked a mile deeper into the forest before collapsing. The arrow was still stuck in his shoulder, he knew, and he had to do something about it. The pain grew each time he accidentally hit the body of the arrow on a branch or bush. Hell, he nearly pushed it further into his shoulder when he finally fell to the ground. 

Although Tommy sometimes seemed like an idiot, as if he had no brain cells, he knew better than to just tear the arrow out of his body. He didn’t have a health potion or even anything to wrap it. He would just bleed out before being able to make it to the bench at sundown as Tubbo had requested. 

Instead, he thought about it for a moment. Something similar had happened to Wilbur as a kid when he, Tommy, and techno (albeit reluctantly) were playing in the woods. It grew dark quick, and they hadn’t remembered the way back home. At some point, he and Wilbur got separated from Techno and ambushed by a few mobs. Wilbur had been shot by a skeleton rather quickly, rendering him useless. Tommy was the first to cry even though Wilbur was the one in pain. Techno had shown up in a matter of seconds, and took care of every single mob in sight, before turning to his brothers. 

Wilbur was laying on the ground, an arrow protruding somewhere near his collarbone, and Tommy sat by staring at Techno with his big blue eyes, crying out for help. His small wings were puffed up in terror, and Techno was at his twin's side in a heartbeat, making sure the other still had a pulse, which thankfully he did. He looked over the arrow before biting his lip and grabbing it. 

Tommy had thought that the other was going to pull it out back then, but instead, he snapped the wood near the skin. When Tommy had asked the pink-haired boy why Techno just explained that it was all he could do until he could get Wilbur back to Phil.

Tommy didn’t understand back then, but he does now. 

Slowly, he reaches a shaky hand over his shoulder, trying his hardest to grab the arrow without causing any more damage. He could barely reach the thin piece of wood before wondering how on earth he was going to do this. His hand was still shaking and he barely had hold of the thing. However, with a random burst of both adrenaline and anger, he twisted his wrist and snapped the wood. 

The pain he felt was immeasurable, and he really thought he was going to pass out right there. Tommy cried out, before slouching forward, his breathing heavy and ragged. He sat like that for a few minutes more before looking up to the sky between the trees. Only now did he realize, as the sky turned orangish in hue, how long he had actually been sitting there. Maybe he had passed out.

As he stood up, he used his good arm to steady himself on a tree. He couldn’t help the whimper that forced its way out of his lips when he looked at the small red puddle where he had sat. His whole body protested as he moved back towards the greater SMP, and where he was no longer welcomed by most of the residents. 

He frowned as the remnants of the community house came into view. Although he was upset, he couldn’t find it in him to be angry with those who blamed him for the destruction of the building. It did seem like something past him would have done just to spite everyone. However, his time in exile changed that, Dream, changed that.

Carefully he walked past what was left of the building, and onto the path that he and Tubbo once declared the Prime path. He took notice of how worn the oak logs looked and thought about how the wooden structure of logstedshire looked like that in less than a week, thanks to Dream and his TNT.

As quickly as he could he pushed forward, and up the hill that led to his old home. Once at the top he ducked behind the remnants of an old tower and checked around. Just when he thought he was safe to come out of his hiding place and move to the bench, he heard two voices come from the direction of L’manburg. 

“Tubbo, I… I don’t understand. I would never-” The first voice spoke, and Tommy recognized it as the same boy who stood up for him during the events earlier in the day, Ranboo. 

“I know.” Tubbo spoke softly as he stopped right behind the bench. He sounds stressed, Tommy thought, before he heard the other boy continue. “Let's just wait for Tommy alright, I told him to meet me here.”

The blonde took that as his cue to enter. He rather ungracefully placed one foot in front of the other and stepped out from where he was hiding. He could feel himself begin to lose his balance and called out for his friends. The two were quick to be by his side, guiding him towards the little oak bench that brought back so many memories. 

“Tommy, oh god, Tommy can you hear me?” Tubbo cried out as he helped him sit. His voice was still hushed due to the fear of being caught, but the sentiment was still there and it made Tommy smile.

It was the first time he smiled in what felt like years. 

“Hey, Big man…” He mumbled. Oh, how he missed calling Tubbo that. The blonde cringed in pain as Tubbo took a hold of his arm, a small cry leaving his throat. 

The small boy looked at him, before turning Tommys slightly to see how his shoulder looked. Tommy heard the audible gasp from Tubbo and the small whimper from Ranboo, before Tubbo was asking the enderman hybrid if he had any healing potions. 

“They’re in my enderchest.” Ranboo had cried out, and Tommy groaned. Tubbo shot him a pointed look which made him flinch, but Tubbo looked back to Ranboo before he could notice.

“In Tommy's old house right there,” Tubbo pointed out, “There should be an Enderchest. Please, hurry.”

Tommy hadn’t noticed when Ranboo left, or when he returned. He was too busy staring at Tubbo, whose hands were trembling. “M’ sorry…” Tommy mumbled as he watched his friend struggle with the lid on the potion handed to him just seconds ago.

Tubbo shook his head, as the lid finally came off. “We have to get what's left of the arrow out of your shoulder.” He spoke softly, and Tommy nodded. He knew this was coming, so he braced himself as much as he could.

Tubbo counted down from three, giving Tommy a small warning, before grabbing the little bit of wood protruding from his friend's back and pulling it. Despite the warning though, Tommy was nowhere near ready for the pain that came afterward. He had tried to keep quiet, but a small cry of pain slipped past his lips. Tears fell freely from his eyes now, and he could hear Ranboo suck in a breath behind him. 

“Tommy- Tommy I need you to drink this now.” Tubbo pleaded from in front of him, holding the potion up to his lips. Tommy let any thought of refusing, die right where they had begun to form when he saw Tubbos pleading eyes. With as much energy he could muster at the moment, he parted his lips and tilted his head back, allowing for the pink liquid to flow into his system.

Tubbo smiled at Tommy when he set the empty bottle down. He quickly threw off his jacket and wrapped it around Tommy’s bad arm, creating a makeshift sling. The small boy was being very mindful of his wing, making sure to account for it in his wrapping. Tommy was more than grateful.

“Do you guys uh, want to go inside?” Ranboo spoke up from behind him, and Tommy watched as Tubbo looked up and nodded his head. 

Moving from the bench to his old house was harder than Tommy had previously anticipated. Although he now had a healing potion in his system, and it was doing wonders for his arrow wound, he had lost a lot of blood. He was considerably weaker now, and it was hard to drag his limbs that felt like dead weight into the dirt shack. However, with the help of the other two teenagers, he was inside and sitting on a chair in no time. 

“I didn’t do it…” Tommy spoke after a few minutes of sitting in silence. Tubbo frowned, before nodding his head. Tommy didn’t notice how Ranboo had flinched slightly as he brought up the topic.

“I know.” Tubbo replied, “I don’t think either of you did it.” 

Tommy furrowed his eyebrows and glanced from Tubbo to Ranboo, who was now holding his memory book close to him and staring at the ground. He was confused, was Ranboo blamed as well? Did something happen after he ran out.

“Tubbo-”

“I don’t care what your stupid memory book says, it wasn’t you.” Tubbo glared hard at Ranboo, before turning sharply to Tommy. The blonde shifted uncomfortably in his seat with the sudden look but tried to shove his discomfort down. Tubbo wasn’t going to hurt him. “And I don’t care what Dream says, It wasn’t your fault either.”

Tommy looked down at his hands, trying to calm his racing heart. Why was the sudden mention of the green bastard bothering him? It’s not like he’s actually here to try and do anything.

“Let's run away.”

Tommy’s head shot up to stare at his best friend incredulously. Runaway? Was he crazy? Tubbo couldn’t just up and leave, he has responsibilities, a nation to take care of. Though the option tempted Tommy, and he couldn’t help the little buzz in the back of his head at the thought. Getting up and walking away. He could pick up his broken pieces and try to put them back together. “But you have a notion to run, big man.”

“I don't want to!” 

“Tubbo...”

“Wilbur didn’t want to hand over L’manburg to me, remember? I’m not cut out for the whole president thing.” Tubbo brought his arms up to cross over his chest, and anyone who knew him as well as Tommy did, knew that there was a deep meaning behind the action. “I just keep failing Tommy, and I don’t want to anymore. The thoughts weighed heavy on my shoulders since the first time I brought it up to you…”

Tommy was biting at his chapped lips while Tubbo spoke, and he couldn’t find the words to say when he did finish. He just stared up at him from where he sat. His heart was telling him to take the offer. To just run away, and get away from it all with his best friend, but somewhere in his brain, he was telling himself to stay. Dream would get angry and he wouldn’t just kill him. At least if he denied, and they went to live the way they were only a few hours ago, Tubbo and Ranboo would be safe. However terrified he was at that thought, though, he didn’t want to be alone anymore. He didn’t want-

“What will I do?” Tommy watched Tubbo turn to Ranboo in confusion, before doing the same. The ender boy seemed to shift uncomfortably with all of the attention on him now. “I mean, If you leave, Tubbo? What do I do?”

In that moment it was as if a light bulb went off in Tubbos head. “Oh.” He hummed, before stepping towards the tall male. Their height difference was comical to Tommy, and he had to bite back the small chuckle that threatened to pass through his vocal cords. “Don’t do anything. If we leave, just come with us.”

“What?”   


“What?”   
  
Ranboo and Tommy questioned in unison, bewildered by Tubbos statement.

“Dream has clearly messed with you Ranboo. He’s written in your memory book, and forged memories that never happened.” Tubbo explained softly, reaching his hand up to Ranboo’s shoulder so he could pat it. “It's not fair you stay here and continue getting manipulated by Dream, while we go and prance around in some flower field.”

Ranboo looked down, seemingly thinking about something before nodding his head. His mouth moved and Tommy thought he was going to say something but instead, the boy snapped his mouth shut.

Tommy looked back to Tubbo after a moment and was surprised to see the shorter already looking at him. "So whaddya say, big man?" He asked, and Tommy just stared. Part of him wanted to say no. Fear, from what felt like years of Dream using him seeped into his thoughts. If he said yes, Dream would hunt them down. The mask-wearing man would Kill not just him, but all three of them. Taking his and Tubbos last lives. However, if he said no, he would be subjecting Tubbo and Ranboo to live unhappy lives. Or would they leave without him? Would they run away and leave Tommy to fend for himself in a nation full of people he once called friends. The same people who would now kill him without a second thought. With a bit of hesitation, he nodded his head.

Almost immediately, Tubbo smiled and clapped his hands together. The short brunette quickly explained his idea of splitting up for an hour or so to grab whatever they needed from their own homes, before meeting right back inside Tommy's home. Tubbo and Ranboo left at the same time, both of them telling Tommy to rest because he needs to heal. 

Tubbo decided to just follow Ranboo to his own home since all of his valuables were already being kept in his enderchest, and his pets were all housed in the boy's home. Tubbo had never built himself a proper home on the server, but no one had ever complained when he slept over, so he never bothered to do so. 

Both boys packed as quickly as they could. Ranboo focused more on supplies and food, gathering them and packing them away in bags to be placed on their horses. The enderman hybrid owned a single skeleton horse named Ranbone, while Tubbo owned two horses named spots and Percy. 

Tubbo helped where he was asked, but focused mainly on getting their pets ready for their travels. Ranboo owned three cats (Enderchest, Enderpearl and Jeffrey) and a dog (Dogboo). While, other than Tubbos two horses, he had a small fox named Sqeeks. As soon as Tubbo had walked into the homemade of spruce wood, Sqeeks had not stopped following him around, and although it made his work a little bit difficult, he wouldn't have had it any other way. 

Dogboo was too excited, Tubbo decided. He wouldn't sit still long enough for Tubbo to tie a lead around his collar, so eventually, Ranboo had to step in and hold the Dog. While Enderchest was easy to wrangle up into his arms, Tubbo had to Chase Enderpearl for at least five minutes before getting the harness onto the cat and tying the lead to it. Jeffery was the oldest, and easiest cat to take care of, Tubbo promptly decided. He watched as the cat lept from where he slept on the bed, to Ranboos shoulders, laying across them. 

After roughly an hour of preparation, the two teenagers walked away from L'manburg, and to Tommy's dirt shack, all of their pets trailing behind them. Ranboo decided he would keep watch over both the animals and act as a lookout while Tubbo went inside to gather Tommy. 

The blonde stirred awake as Tubbo poked his face gently, "Tubbo?"

"Hello there big man, you ready?"

"So it wasn't a dream?" 

"Nope," Tubbo replied, popping the 'p' rather obnoxiously. "We're finally leaving, together."

Tommy smiled. He still felt weak from the arrow he had taken earlier in the day, but he shot to his feet, not wanting the chance to slip away. He stumbled, only to have Tubbo grab his arm and steady him. "Thanks, Tubs."

Once outside of the dirt shack, Tommy smiled at Ranboo, the taller boy stood shocked, but he smiled back nonetheless. Before they could begin their Journey, Tubbo ushered Tommy onto one of the horses, claiming he was too weak for long journeys. So while he and Ranboo walked, Tommy would ride on the back of the horse carrying no supplies. 

At first, Tommy denied the idea, saying that he was perfectly capable of walking. However, after tripping on seemingly nothing when trying to prove his point, he climbed onto the horse, clearly embarrassed. His embarrassment, however, was replaced when the two black cats were placed into his lap by Tubbo. "They don't like walking a lot, take care of them."

Just like that, the trio had set off on a new adventure that would allow them the life they never had. A life without war. A life where they could be kids again. One full of healing and growing. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there!  
> I really hope you liked this first chapter and decide to stick around for future updates!  
> I will try my best to get them out in a timely manner, but I am also studying to get my GED at the moment! So please bear with me!  
> Please if you like this story let me know by commenting or giving it a kudos! It helps me to know that people are actually interested in the fic so I don't abandon it.  
> word count: 3872
> 
> Thank you all for reading and have a great day!  
> <3


	2. Haven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The three boys find their new home.   
> Tommy and Tubbo talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I am back with chapter 2, and in such a timely manner too!  
> Honestly, I'm just as surprised as you are.  
> Note: If any of the mentioned CC's are uncomfortable with this fic, I will not hesitate to delete it.   
> Please enjoy the update!

The trio had no idea where they were going. They just walked, and walked, and walked until they couldn’t do so any longer. When that time came, they would find shelter under a nearby tree, or in a nearby cave, and rest until morning, when they would do it all over again. Not feeling the need to stay in contact with anyone in the greater SMP any longer, they threw their communicators into the first lake they saw. 

For the first few days, Tubbo and Ranboo refused to let Tommy walk, and insisted he ride on the horse instead. It wasn't until Tubbo looked like the walking dead, that Ranboo agreed for Tommy to walk so that the shorter boy could sleep while they carried on their journeys. Tommy was a lot quieter than he was before the exile, Ranboo noticed, and although the tallest teenager did like the silence, he also enjoyed having someone to talk to. Someone to help drown out the intrusive thoughts that seemed to be plaguing his mind as of late. 

Once, Ranboo had tried to ask Tommy about his lack of vocalization, but it only resulted in the younger trying to laugh it off. Ranboo noticed the shift in the Blond's demeanor though, and he frowned. Tommy seemed to grow even quieter after that, even if he had tried to speak more. On the fourth day of traveling, Tubbo slept through the entirety of the day and night. 

On the morning of the sixth day, it was raining. The three, and all of their pets, were hiding under the canopy of a dark oak tree while snacking on some bread they gathered from a village the night before. Tubbo had sat in between both Ranboo and Tommy with a small Sqeeks gathered in his lap. Ranboo was on his left, all three of his cats curled somewhere next to him, while Tommy was on his right, Dogboo laying with his head in Tommy’s lap. All three horses were tied to a nearby tree, with all of their supplies laying on the floor to give the animals a bit of rest, too. 

Ranboo had tried to apologize to the group for holding them back, but neither Tommy nor Tubbo allowed him to get very far with that. Although Ranboo had tried to say it was his fault that they couldn’t continue on in the rain, they quickly reassured him that they wouldn't have done so in the rain anyway. The enderman hybrid couldn’t keep a smile off of his face after the reassurance. 

They played games like I spy, which Tommy proudly pointed out George would probably suck at, since he is color blind, which sent the other two into a laughing fit that lasted nearly five minutes. Tommy had wished he could be as happy as them, and he knows that he should have been, but he couldn’t find the joy that the other two so easily found. 

The rain didn't stop until the seventh day. When the three began their journey again, Tommy and Tubbo agreed that Ranboo should get a chance to ride the horse instead of walking. The tall boy tried to say that he didn't need it, but the two shorter males refused to begin walking until he got on the horse.

That day they crossed a snowy biome, and it made Tommy think of Technoblade, Philza and Wilbur. He thought about the day he ran away from Logstedshire after Dream blew it, and everything he owned, up. He remembered how he nearly took his last life, before running to the frozen tundra, and nearly freezing to death. Then he found Techno’s home, and he built his little basement underneath the house.

He remembered Techno’s expression when he found the little room, and how he quickly got over it. His older brother even helped him when Dream came to find him. He trusted Tommy, and he just washed all that trust away a week ago when he took the Axe of Peace and chose to stay by Tubbo’s side. 

He wondered what would have happened to him if he chose to escape with Techno then. If he decided that Tubbo wasn’t worth it any longer, and instead chose to go live with his family. Would they have become a family again? He couldn’t help but miss back then, when he had the second strongest, maybe even strongest person, protecting him. He wondered if one day he could fix the damage he caused. 

He shook his head of any more thoughts before continuing on with their journey. 

It was about two weeks after that when they came across a jungle biome. Tubbo brought up the idea of a treehouse, and who were the other two, to refuse. A treehouse sounded like a childhood dream come true.

So the three of them set up a small camp right outside of the jungle so they could pace themselves while building their new home. That first night by the biome, the three of them share idea after idea that they had for their treehouse. Ranboo said they should make it pet-proof, so that the pets could get up and down easily, meaning stairs instead of ladders. Tubbo suggested they have separate rooms on different trees and connect them all with bridges, which the other two agreed would be cool. Tommy reminded them that they had to make stables outside of the jungle because there was no way the horses would get into the treehouse.

They continued to share thoughts and ideas until they could see the sun peaking over the horizon. Only then did they realize that in order to do any of the things on their list, they would have to get some sleep. 

They were all awoken by a wandering villager around one in the afternoon. Ranboo was the first to process it, and went to one of the bags chucked onto the ground near his tent, and grabbed a few emeralds. He traded with the villager, getting the three of them some food to last for a few days. After eating, they began gathering the resources they needed for building. 

Tommy and Ranboo traveled back a few hours to a spruce forest to gather wood, while Tubbo gathered some simple jungle logs and built a fenced-in area for their horses to graze. When Ranboo and Tommy returned it way past nightfall. They were glad Tubbo decided to light up the area, so they could easily find their way back. Tubbo had already gone to sleep in his tent, but he left the two some mushroom stew in a pot over the campfire. 

The next day, Ranboo had begun to build a staircase, leading up to where the main room of their Treehouse would be. Tommy and Tubbo had gone mining for materials in a nearby cave, and that was when both Tubbo and Ranboo learned that Tommy would not wear armor. They had tried to give the boy a simple iron chest plate, but he had scrambled away from them, shaking his head. The only bit of armor he seemed okay with was the scute he had since the day they initially ran off. The two didn’t push for answers, only reminding him to be extra careful, as he and Tubbo went down into the mine. 

They came back before sundown, bags full of ores, to find Ranboo nearly halfway done with the stairs. They placed the ores to smelt, before going to help their friend. They managed to nearly finish the stairs before calling it a night.

It was a week later when they finished the first building, and they spent the whole day moving their things from the ground, into their home. Most of the building, Tommy had left to his friends. He was never really good with such a thing, and his dirt shack proved that. Instead the Blond worked on creating a farm out of the seeds Ranboo had brought from his house in L’manburg. He decided that if they were going to live in the middle of nowhere, they were going to need a steady food supply. Tommy silently thanked Techno for teaching him how to farm potatoes when he was younger. 

It wasn't until a month later when they deemed their treehouse finished. (Unless they chose to add anything later, or give it upgrades.) 

There were stairs that led from right outside of the Jungle biome, up to the main room of their treehouse. This room they deemed their kitchen and living space. The room had bridges splitting to the right and left. On the right, there were three rather tall trees, with three almost identical buildings connected to them, all at differing heights. 

Ranboo’s room was first, at the lowest height. He woke up the earliest and decided it would be best to have the room closest to the exit so he wouldn’t accidentally wake the other two up. Tubbo’s room was next, being a little bit higher up than Ranboos. He didn’t have a reason for getting the middle room, but Tommy wanted the last one, so he agreed to take it. Tommy was really grateful that his friend didn’t mind, and flashed him a big toothy grin when he took off to set up his bed.

The left bridge from the main room led to two more rooms. The biggest was inherently the chest room, full of their storage and smelters. Tubbo had so graciously sat there for hours trying to organize the mess they had accumulated over the past month. The second room was small, and sitting atop a tree. It was something Tommy had really wanted to be implemented into the build. The blond called it his treetop gazebo, and he would sometimes just sit up there and think.

It took another week of working on the stables before they deemed it complete, and worthy of their horses. It was large and had enough room for five other horses, with a giant field they spent hours fencing off, all so they could, as Tommy said, “Graze like the fuckin’ majestic beast that they are.”

When there were no longer any group projects to be worked on, Tommy spent most of his days either down in his farm, or up in the Gazebo. The boy always had a stone sword strapped to his hip, and he refused to carry anything better. Both Tubbo and Ranboo carried at least Diamond, especially when they would leave the comfort of their tree house. Once, the two suggested that Tommy use the axe he had brought with him on their journey, the Axe of Peace. The blond only graced them with the short response that he wasn’t worthy enough to wield it, before walking away. 

It was a rather cold spring night when Tommy climbed to his Gazebo instead of sleeping. He had quietly passed his friend's rooms, assuming that they had been asleep. Tommy had sat down at the bench Tubbo insisted they put on the treetop and rubbed at his shoulder. His wings were aching and begging to be set free of their binds, but Tommy tried to ignore the pain as best he could. 

“You know you don’t have to keep them bound anymore, right.” A soft voice spoke up from behind Tommy, which he immediately recognized as his short friend. Tommy listened as Tubbo’s footsteps, although soft, grew louder as he rounded the bench and sat next to him. “No one here would hurt them. Not me, not Ranboo.”   


“I know…” Tommy muttered, his voice low and his head down. He dropped his hand from his shoulder, into his lap, staring at it instead of looking at his friend. “But it's hard.”

“What’s hard? Explain it to me, big man.”

“I’ve had them bound from the moment we moved to the greater SMP.” Tommy began, “From the first disc war to L’manburg, to Pogtopia, and even while in exile. I rarely unbound them because I knew what would happen if the wrong person found out… And then Wilbur- oh god, I saw what Dream did to his wings.”   


Tubbo placed a hand on Tommy's back, rubbing circles right above where his wings connect to it. “Take your time…” The boy spoke, his voice soft and comforting.

“I just don’t want to lose them.” Tommy finally looked up then. His bright blue eyes were filled with tears, and some fell past his eyelids. He tried to push them away, but the more he tried, the more tears fell down his cheeks. 

“Oh, Tommy…” Tubbo hummed, pulling his best friend into a hug. “He can’t do anything to your wings here. Remember that, okay? He doesn’t even know where we are.”

Tommy could only cry harder as his friend tried to calm him. He wasn’t used to the touch and affection. Although he, Ranboo, and Tubbo had been traveling and living together for nearly two months, he wasn’t keen on touch anymore, and the other two respected his boundaries. Now that he was being held though, he realized how much he missed it. He pushed closer to his friend until his sobs died down, and he deemed himself relatively okay for the moment. He pulled away from Tubbo who gave him a weary smile.

“Better now, Big man?”

Tommy nodded, “Yeah, Thanks big T.” 

Tubbo’s smile grew less weary and he couldn’t help giving Tommy a small pat on his shoulder. “Turn around.”

“What?”

“We’re gonna take off the binding,” Tubbo explained cautiously, before frantically continuing. “Obviously, you don’t have to, but I know your wings probably really hurt right now.”   


“Okay,” Tommy responded before facing away from a dumbfounded Tubbo, and pulling off Wilbur's coat and then his shirt, leaving only the bandages that kept his wings to his back.

Tubbo let out a small audible gasp as he stared forward, before gently searching the bandages for the knot keeping them together. Upon finding it, he realized it had been tied for so long, that undoing it would simply be impossible. “Tommy, I have to go get the shears, I’ll be right back.”

“Are you cutting my hair now too?”

“No, I can't get the knot undone, I have to cut the bandages off.” Tubbo explained, before grabbing his lantern and heading to the storage room. After a few minutes of searching through the chest, he found the shears and went back to Tommy. The blond still sitting in the exact position he was in when Tubbo had left. 

The brunette sat back down and lifted the shears up to the bandages, warning Tommy before each cut he made. The boy let out a soft sigh when the bandages fell from his torso and Tubbo let out another gasp. “How bad do they look?”

“Tommy, you’ve barely got any feathers.” Tubbo described softly as he reached out to touch the black feathers that were slowly falling away from the wings. The tall boy flinched at the touch, not used to having any contact there. Tubbo gave him a moment before reaching out again, this time grabbing onto the wing softly and stretching it out. “I think all the muscle has deteriorated from lack of use, too.”

Tommy nodded his head as his friend continued to move his wing for him. He tried to move it on his own when Tubbo told him to, but he quickly found that it took too much energy and the pain that shot through his wings was not a pleasant one. Tubbo understood and didn’t try to push him any further, only running his fingers through the feathers, helping the loose ones fall to the ground. 

“You’re gonna have to work out your wings, big man.” Tubbo spoke as he massaged Tommy’s wings that ached of disuse. The blond nodded his head and continued to listen as his best friend spoke. “I can try to help you with that if you’d like. Make it a nightly routine to do this, until you can move them on your own. The feathers will come back in time, but we can probably give you a little bit of a regen potion to help with that. Unfortunately, that won't help your muscles too much, you’ll have to work those on your own-”

“How do you know so much about wings?” Tommy decided to ask, cutting off the smaller boy's tangent. 

“Oh! When Phil still lived in new L’manburg, I asked him to teach me everything he knew about wings. Just in case, when you came back from exile, you were able to use them.” Tubbo explained thoughtfully, and Tommy smiled. Tubbo had learned about wings just to help him, all while Dream was convincing him that his friends didn’t actually care. He sighed as Tubbo began to talk again. 

It was nearly an hour later when both Tommy and Tubbo had started to nod off and decided to call it a night. Tubbo had made a joke about actually cutting Tommy’s hair, and the blond promptly told him to “Fuck off” before going to his own room and falling onto his bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you all enjoyed this chapter, and if you did please make sure to let me know! Comments and Kudos are greatly appreciated! They let me know that people like this story and actually want me to continue it! Your support means the world to me!  
> Word count: 2861  
> Stay safe!  
> <3


	3. Your Eyes Tell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ranboo see's Tommy's wings for the first time.  
> On a completely unrelated note, Ranboo has a nightmare?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is chapter three! WOOOO  
> So Ranboo has a very bad nightmare in this chapter, resulting in quite a bit of panic from him, so please don't read if that can upset you in any way.   
> I love you all, and have fun reading!

Tommy hadn’t meant to wake up so early in the morning after going to bed so late in the night. He wanted to sleep in (even though he knew it was impossible), and possibly not leave his bed the entire day, but the loud barks from Dogboo outside of his door forced him up and onto his feet. Momentarily, he forgot about his wings that now fell from his back and dragged on the floor behind him. He frowned and tried to lift them, but shook his head when he realized it was of no use. 

He let them just drag behind him as he opened the door and stared down at an excited Dogboo. “I wanted to sleep in you little fucker…” He muttered before stifling a yawn, hiding it behind his hand. He rubbed at his eyes for a moment, trying to wake himself up further, before Dogboo took off down the bridges between buildings. 

Tommy glared as the dog disappeared from view. Even if he wanted to go back to bed now, the sun would be shining in through his windows, making it near impossible for him to do so. He shook his head and decided to move towards the kitchen, breakfast didn’t sound too bad right about now. 

Ranboo was already sitting at the table, eating some eggs and bacon with a book in hand when he entered. “Goodmorning, Tommy.” The enderman hybrid spoke, not bothering to look up from his book. 

“How the fuck did you know it was me?” Tommy asked, staring at the older boy intently, waiting for an answer.

Only then did Ranboo look up from his book. He smiled at Tommy before gesturing down to his feet, “Your footsteps are very distinct. Both yours and Tubbo’s.” 

“Well, alright then…” Tommy mumbled before looping around the table and into the kitchen. He wasn’t in the mood for a heavy meal so he instead settled for just an apple. 

“Nice wings, by the way.” Ranboo spoke, rather nonchalantly, before freezing. Slowly, he looked up from his book and turned to face Tommy, the confusion evident in his features. “When did you get wings?”

Tommy stiffened, not really knowing what to say or do. He knew Ranboo wasn’t going to judge him, Hell, the boy was just asking how long he had his wings, which Tommy couldn’t even blame him for asking. He was the one who hid his wings from everyone, it wasn’t Ranboo’s fault that he didn’t know of their existence. He tried to pull his wings up behind him but furrowed his eyebrows at the pain that shot through them. 

“He’s always had them.” A small voice answered for him, and Tommy sent a grateful and relieved smile his way. Tubbo yawned in response but nodded his head anyway. He looked over to Ranboo and shrugged, “He just kept em’ hidden.”

“Oh,” Ranboo replied, seemingly in thought. He sat there for a moment, unmoving before turning to Tommy. He looked at him once and tilted his head, “Cool, can you fly?”

“I can’t even lift them,” Tommy explained, rubbing at his arm self-consciously. “And I got no feathers. Definitely can’t fly.”

“That's okay, they’re still epic.” Ranboo smiled before turning back to his food. He didn’t pick his book back up, instead, he seemed to push the bacon on his plate around. As if he was too distracted by something else, to eat.

Tommy looked to Tubbo who seemed to do the same after a few seconds. The shorter just shrugged before walking further into the room, grabbing an egg and a pan. “I, Uh-” Ranboo spoke up softly from his seat, startling the other two slightly, “I know how to sew, so if you uh, want me to… Fix your shirts and stuff, to accommodate your wings, I can.” 

Tommy’s eyes widened for a moment before his whole expression softened. “Really?”

“Mhm…”

“That would be amazing, Big man. Thanks!” Tommy couldn’t help the bit of joy in his voice as he smiled at the tallboy.

“Any time, Tommy. Just bring the clothes you want me to fix, to my room later. I think I’m going to nap right now.” He explained, before standing up and shutting his book, not bothering to mark his page. The book was kind of boring anyway, and he didn’t think he wanted to finish it. 

He picked up his plate and moved it to the sink when Tommy spoke up from where he was now seated next to Tubbo at the table. “How are you gonna sleep? There are sun rays and shit.”   


“Curtains, Tommy. They do wonders.”

“Oh fuck off.” The blond groaned before flicking off the taller boy, resulting in laughs from both Tubbo and Ranboo. 

Ranboo just shook his head and left the room with a smile on his face. The walk to his bedroom was short, and he left the door cracked so the cats, who were sleeping on the doggy bed, could leave if they chose to. He shut the curtains on each window before laying down and pulling the blankets up to his neck. 

\---

When Ranboo woke up he felt like he couldn’t breathe. It was as if he was suffocating, choking on the air that ceased to exist. He looked around and panicked and even more. Everywhere he looked was just black. The sky, the walls, the ground, all black. It was as if he were in a void of some kind. But that didn’t make sense. He was just in the treehouse.

He shook his head, trying to calm his racing heart, and he breathed deep, trying to get some air back into his lungs. Nothing seemed to be working. So as his panic grew, he ran in whatever direction he was facing. Was it north? Or was he going south? He couldn’t tell, but he ran anyway, trying to chase a light he couldn’t see.

After a moment of running, he tripped, falling face-first into the vast nothingness below him. The ground had seemed so sturdy just a second ago, so why was he falling now? There were so many questions he didn’t have answers for, and although he tried to wrack his brain for anything to try and make sense of it all, he still came up short. 

His thought process was stopped quickly as his entire body was engulfed in water. In just a moment, heat flared up all over his skin, and it felt like he was getting stabbed by thousands of needles over and over again. It didn’t seem to matter how much he struggled, though, he couldn’t swim up.

He thrashed about in the water until a hand reached for him. He cried out as he grabbed at the hand, and suddenly he was being thrown out of the water, and back into the void.

He looked around, searching for answers, anything to give him a clue as to what happened. He sat on the ground until another hand reached out to him, and quickly he realized it was the same hand that pulled him from the water. His eyes trailed from the black fingerless gloves to the green hoodie. His heart rate picked up as his eyes continued to graze from the sweater to a white mask with a simple smiley face.

Ranboo stared in disbelief, he had left Dream behind. He was so far away from the Greater SMP. He should be safe now. So why is he here? Why is Dream standing in front of him?

In a matter of seconds, Dream was gone, and instead a smiley face that seemed to be glitching sat in his place. Ranboo tried to look away, but luck was never on his side. Everywhere his eyes landed there was a new one, smiling right back at him.

Breathing seemed practically impossible, as he continued to try and find a place to look, somewhere without a smiley face.

**_“It’s your fault.”_ **

**_“You blew it up.”_ **

**_“And you really just let Tommy take the blame.”_ **

Ranboo shook his head, trying to rid himself of the voices.

**_“You should have been in that exile too.”_ **

**_“But Tommy took all the blame.”_ **

**_“You don’t deserve-”_ **

“Stop!” Ranboo screamed, shutting his eyes, and clamping his hands over his ears. “Just stop! Please leave me alone!”

\---

Tommy was in his room gathering together clothes for Ranboo to fix, and Tubbo was reading a book on the couch when it happened. A scream and a loud crash came from the Enderman hybrid's room, startling both of them. Tommy tripped over one of his wings, resulting in him falling onto it. Tubbo stood straight up and ran out of the kitchen/living room and to Ranboo’s bedroom.

“What the actual Hell was that?!” Tommy screeched as he stormed out of his bedroom, meeting Tubbo on the deck in front of Ranboos room. Tubbo shrugged before reaching to open the door. 

The two stared in shock as Ranboo screamed and thrashed around his room. The boy had his hands over his ears as if he were blocking out sounds. His eyes were open, but they didn’t recognize these eyes. Ranboo had one green eye and one red eye, so why were both of them purple? 

Tommy rushed into the room, his short friend following close behind him. He reached out and placed a hand on Ranboo’s shoulder causing him to freeze. In just a split second he was being shoved backward, away from the male. He tripped over his limp wings, and Tubbo had tried to catch him, but it only resulted in both of them falling to the floor.

“What’s going on?” Tubbo asked, pushing Tommy up slightly. He knew the awkward position the taller male was in, definitely wasn’t very comfortable for his wings.

Tommy shook his head and stood up as quickly as he could before holding a hand out to Tubbo. “I don’t know.” He replied, pulling the shorter into a standing position when he had gripped his hand. 

When they were both standing, they focused their attention back on their friend. While they were trying to get up, Ranboo had managed to grab his sword and was now holding it out in front of him. “He’s going to hurt himself!” Tubbo shouted as the enderman hybrid swung the sword.

“Or us!” Tommy dutifully corrected as he pulled out his own sword. It was only stone, and couldn’t do much against Ranboo’s diamond one, but he knew it could block at least a few attacks. So when Ranboo swung his sword down at Tubbo, Tommy was quick to jump in front of the brunette and block the attack. 

“Ranboo!” Tubbo cried out from behind him as he blocked another swing, “Ranboo please wake up!”

“Big man,” Tommy Grunted, “I know this isn’t you. Your eyes aren’t normally purple and shit.” 

Ranboo faltered slightly, and Tommy took that as his chance to knock the sword out of his hand. His eyes flickered with recognition before hardening. He held his hands out in front of him as if he were getting ready to fistfight.

“Ranboo, please.” Tubbo pleaded, stepping forward and placing his hand on his friend's hand. “Come back to us big man.” Ranboo blinked a few times before his eyes went from their unnatural purple back to their normal colors of red and green. “There you are.”   


“Tubbo?” Ranboo’s voice was shaky and raw from all of his screaming before. Tubbo smiled and nodded which sent Ranboo over an invisible ledge. He began to sob and cling to the short boy. He was crying into Tubbo’s shoulder even if it meant he had to lean over uncomfortably to do so.

Tommy just stared before dropping his battered sword to the ground and falling to his knees with relief. His friends were okay now. Everyone was safe. He wiped away any tears that threatened to fall before standing up and walking over to his friends.

Tubbo had his arms wrapped around Ranboo’s waist as the taller boy continued to cry. Tubbo had tried to calm Ranboo down with comforting words. “It’s okay,” He whispered, “No one is hurt. You’re okay.”

Tommy walked closer and placed a hand on Ranboo’s shoulder, causing the teenager to look at him. The look of sheer terror and pain in Ranboo’s expression made Tommy take a step back, but he never removed his hand. It only took a moment for him to compose himself before he was smiling sadly at Ranboo, “Scared?” He asked and the taller male nodded his head, “That's okay. We all get scared sometimes, besides nightmares- night terrors? I don’t know what you would call  _ that-  _ but it seems scary.”

Ranboo didn’t know what to say as he listened to Tommy speak. Just two months ago if you asked him “Would Tommy comfort someone after a nightmare?” His answer would definitely be no unless it were Tubbo. He’s the exception. Now though, he was being comforted by the person he least expected to be comforted by. To be fair, it was in no way the best comfort, but it was good enough, and hey, at least he was trying.

“We had no idea what was going on. Your eyes were all purple and shit, and you were screaming, crying and thrashing around like a fish outta water. It was pretty scary for us.” Ranboo wanted to apologize then, but Tommy just cut him off the second he opened his mouth. “But I bet it was nothing compared to whatever crazy shit you had going on in your brain. So don’t apologize, alright. You can’t control your body when you’re fuckin’ sleeping.”

Ranboo hadn’t noticed when the tears stopped, or when Tubbo had started wiping his face dry with the sleeve of his shirt, but it happened. He smiled at the both of them and thanked them. Tommy pats his shoulder before stepping away, towards the door. “Don’t mention it, big man. However, you’re definitely helping me fix my clothes now.”

“I already said I would!” Ranboo shouted as Tommy walked off, waving a hand over his shoulder as he walked out of sight.

“That never happened before…” Tubbo spoke up just as soon as he knew Tommy was out of earshot. Ranboo looked down at him and frowned. It was true, even back in L’manburg when he and Tubbo were first getting to know each other. Or when they had become friends and shared a house, because Tubbo never felt the need to build one. He never had a nightmare so  _ intense  _ before. Definitely not so bad where he acted out in the conscious world. 

“I don’t know what happened.” Ranboo mumbled, “I’m sorry.”   


Tubbo shook his head, “As Tommy said before, there is nothing to apologize for. You had no idea.” The short brunette finally looked up and smiled at him, the tear stains clear on his cheeks, but Ranboo didn’t comment on it. He already knew why Tubo had been crying. He knew he was the reason for the shorter boy's tears. “C’mon,” Tubbo spoke, “Let's get you some hot tea, I bet your throat hurts from all that crying.”

Ranboo nodded and followed Tubbo out of his bedroom. He felt his cats rub against his legs as he walked, and he could hear Dogboo bark as soon as he noticed their presence. He tried his hardest to shake whatever bits of the nightmare he remembered, off. He didn’t want to remember it. The drowning, the pain, the suffocating. 

The smiley face.

He knew that face would haunt him for a very long time, possibly even forever. He didn’t want to see that face anymore, though. He left that face behind when he ran away with Tommy and Tubbo two months ago. Why was it back now? Why couldn’t he just be free?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think?  
> I really hope you all enjoyed this chapter as it was a little hard for me to write and definitely took more time than chapter two.  
> Overall, I am happy with this chapter, though.  
> Let me know what you all think!  
> Word count: 2647  
> Love you! Stay safe!  
> <3


	4. Voices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tommy can fly and Tubbo hears an eerily familiar voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!!!  
> This chapter is long overdue and I sincerely apologize for the delay!  
> I hope you enjoy!  
> CW: panic attack, please consider this before reading >.<

Weeks had passed since Ranboo’s first “Enderstate Nightmare”, and both Tommy and Tubbo had gotten used to comforting the Enderman hybrid when his screams echoed through the Jungle in the middle of the night. It doesn’t happen every night, which they’re all thankful for, but when it did happen, they would all struggle to fall back asleep, despite their exhaustion.

Ranboo wished he never bothered the other two, and he tries his hardest not to worry them more than he already had. He never told them what his dreams were about. He never told them of the smiley face that haunted his dreams. Never once did he spare a single detail on the hand clad with a fingerless glove which tore him from the water that burned his skin. They all had their fair share of trauma from the man, and he didn’t want to add to their stress, so he tried to constantly assure his friends that he was alright. 

Tommy’s wings healed nicely and his feathers were all grown in by the fourth week after their unbinding. His muscles grew steadily thanks to all of the time he spent working them out with Tubbo’s help, especially in the beginning. 

The first time he had managed to actually take off of the ground, both Tubbo and Ranboo were there to witness it. He had been practicing for nearly three hours and everytime he landed face first in the grass from a failed attempt, he’d spring right back up and try again. Tubbo was sat in the field with him from the beginning. Someone had to be there just in case things went wrong. Plus, Tommy had the bad habit of forgetting to stay hydrated, so Tubbo supposed he could just read a book and occasionally remind Tommy to drink something.

Ranboo had joined about three and a half hours in. He took a seat on the blanket next to Tubbo and placed a basket next to him. “There’s some food in here if you’re hungry.” The boy spoke softly, and Tubbo nodded, reaching for the basket. After rummaging through it for a moment, he let out a content sigh and pulled out a sandwich. 

“Thanks, Ranboo.” The brunet mumbled, smiling at him, before taking a bite of the sandwich and humming contently as the taste of peanut butter and jelly filled his senses.

“Of course.” Ranboo replied, before looking out to the field where Tommy had just fallen over. “Tommy! Take a break and come eat!” He called out, but the younger just grunted and shook his head.

“I’ll eat only when I nail this!”

The enderman hybrid just rolled his eyes at the response and leaned back, now laying on the blanket. “Why is he so stubborn?”

“Dunno.” Tubbo responded,even if the sound was muffled due to the sandwich in his mouth. Ranboo chuckled as he shook his head, the shorter only furrowing his eyebrows in response. “Do you think he’s gonna overexert himself?”

“I’m gonna be honest,” Ranboo sighed, “Probably. I mean this is Tommy we're talking about and when he gets worked up, he doesn’t know how to take a break.” Tubbo nodded in agreement as they continued their mindless chatter.

The voice in Tubbo’s head was not a new one, in fact it had been there since the moment they decided to run away together. So when he was told to take his sword and stab Ranboo right then and there, he knew to ignore it. He refused to ever do a thing the voice said, as it sounded oddly similar to Dream, and he wanted nothing to do with the green man any longer.

So the voice's wish was never his command. When it told him to shove tommy off of the horse the first night of travelling, he ignored it. When he was told to push Ranboo off one of the many bridges in their home, he pushed the thought away. Sometimes the voice didn't try to get him to murder his friends, instead it would remind him to eat. It would tell him to make sure to get a full night's rest. Out of anger, regret and maybe even spite, he didn’t listen to even those. So he never did what the voice told him to do.

So when the voice asked him if he was enjoying the sandwich, he cursed then spat it out. He felt kind of bad, because Ranboo had made that food for him, and now he’d make the tall male feel bad. 

Ranboo pat the boys back as he coughed, choking slightly on the peanutbutter caught in the back of his throat. “Tubbo? You good?” Ranboo asked, “You zoned out for a minute, before just completely spitting out the food. Is it bad?”

“No, no, it’s not bad.” The short male corrected as quickly as he could, trying to regain his composure as he spoke, “Just not that hungry anymore…” Ranboo dropped the subject, instead deciding to focus on the blond who was trying to take flight. Tubbo had never been more thankful for the silence.

\---

Tommy had ignored Ranboo and Tubbo after the taller male tried to get him to go and eat, deciding it would be better to fully focus on the task at hand. He thought long and hard, trying to remember how Wilbur had used his wings to take off, before they were taken from him. The last time he saw the man fly was before L’manburg. Before any of the wars. Before Dream.

He shook his head, deciding to think about the one other man with wings that he knew of. His dad. Philza had never feared Dream, and he always had Technoblade on his side, so Dream never threatened his wings, unlike Wilbur. Dream knew he couldn’t take on the two other strongest people on the server.

Tommy tried to imagine what Phil’s stance was like when he was going to take off. He thought about where his feet were placed, and how they were positioned. Did his arms hang loosely at his sides, or were they held up, bracing himself for the impact of the wind? He tried to remember how his wings were spread out, and how far back they were held.

Slowly he placed one foot in front of the other as he leaned forward ever so slightly, determination set in his features. He pulled his tired and heavy wings back, ignoring the slight ache from overexertion. He sucked in a deep breath before pushing forward with all of the strength he could muster. His eyes were screwed shut and his heart dropped for a moment. 

_It didn’t work, did it?_ He thought to himself, _I tried to remember, but I failed didn't I?_

It took Tubbo and Ranboo’s shouting to snap him out of his thoughts. His eyes opened, and only then did he realize how his wings were moving, keeping himself off the ground. He could feel the air push through his feathers and he smiled and cheered aloud. He was only a few yards off the ground, but it was enough. He felt free.

The sense of true freedom was short lived though, as he came tumbling towards the ground. His wings finally gave out and fell limp behind him. 

He hit the ground hard, and he could hear his friends cry out for him, but the smile from before never left his face. He couldn’t feel the ache in his wings, and he half wondered if they had gone numb, or if it was the adrenaline still pumping through his veins. He sat straight up, grinning like a mad man with grass sticking out of his hair, when Tubbo and Ranboo managed to get to him. “Did you see that!?”

Tubbo, upon realizing that Tommy was okay, sighed and fell back onto the grass with a thud. He placed a hand over his heart as he looked his friend up and down, checking for any visible injuries. “Jesus Christ big man, you scared me!”

Ranboo arrived a second later and stared Dumbfoundedly at Tommy for a moment, off put by the shit eating grin the blond wore. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine!” Tommy replied quickly, “But I flew! Did you see that! I actually did it!”

Ranboo sighed relieved, his lips curving upwards forming a small smile, “I saw.” He spoke softly. Quite a big contrast to Tommy’s yelling. “You looked really cool. Like a bird!”

“Don’t call me a fuckin bird, enderboy!” 

“Bird boy.” 

Tommy glared half-heartedly at Ranboo before Turning away. With a huff he looked to Tubbo, before a smile once again graced his features. It was hard not to smile when he was talking to Tubbo. “I can fly.”

“I saw, Big man.” Tubbo grinned, “You looked really epic, I’m proud of you.” Tommy couldn’t help the tears that welled in his eyes at the simple statement. He was proud of himself too. “Now come eat. You’ll need your energy if you ever plan to do that again.”

\---

That night Tommy and Tubbo found each other at the Gazebo. They hadn’t planned to meet up there, but Tubbo refused to sleep thanks to the little voice in the back of his head, and Tommy was filled with too much energy to sleep. They sat in comfortable silence though as the night rolled on.

That was until Tommy decided to break the silence. “Thanks Tubbo.”

“For what?” Tubbo asked, genuinely confused by his friend's words. Had he done something to be worthy of his friends thanks?

“I never thought I’d fly again.” Tommy spoke softly, “I bound my wings because I was absolutely terrified of the idea of losing them. But today, Tubbo, today I flew! I felt so free even if I was only ten feet off of the ground.”

“Okay?”

Tommy sighed before letting out a small chuckle, “Tubbo you can be a real dumbass sometimes.” Before the Brunet could argue this, Tommy placed his hand on his shoulder and smiled. “It only happened because you helped me.” 

Tubbo made an O shape with his mouth before thinking, had he really done that much? All he did was help Tommy unbind his wings. It was totally up to Tommy to continue working them out. The shorter was about to argue Tommy’s statement but he stood up abruptly and puffed out his wings. As if he knew Tubbo were going to argue with him he said, “Just take the compliment, dick head.”

Tubbo chucked and shook his head, staring at his best friend, as he reached out to run his fingers through his feathers. His wings had healed nicely. The black feathers were fully grown in, and it was clear how healthy they were now. He couldn’t help but wonder though, if the big set of wings were heavy for his friend. Was it uncomfortable to sit down or sleep?

**_Why don’t you help him then?_**

What?

**_Cut the wings off, Tubbo. Relieve him of the weight. Make him comfortable._**

Tubbo shot back, falling off of the bench. He stared wide eyed at his outstretched hand, a single black feather held tightly in his grip. 

“Ow! What the hell, Tubbo?!”

He couldn’t breathe. He needed to get away from Tommy. “I- I’m sorry-”

“Woah Tubbo? Are you okay?” 

He had to leave. He could hear his heart in his ears as his friend moved closer to him. On instinct he pushed himself backwards, and Tommy froze. He took a chance and looked up at Tommy’s face. 

The blond looked crushed. In that moment Tubbo wished that he could read minds. He wished that he knew what his best friend was thinking. Those thoughts were washed away like the tide though, as he stood up, still gripping onto Tommy’s feather.

He needed to leave. One step. Two steps, and then he was running. He left Tommy on the Gazebo as he ran to his room. He needed to breathe and he couldn’t do that around Tommy. Not after the suggestion from the voice. Not after what he just _did_.

His heart ached as he slammed his door, and crawled into his bed. Sqeeks was already there waiting for him, and Tubbo didn’t have the heart to push away the small fox as he curled into his side. He let a few tears slip down his cheeks as he held out the feather in front of him. 

He had just hurt his best friend. 

**_Shoulda cut the whole thing off._**

Tubbo threw the feather after the voice spoke, and he watched as the thing floated to the ground. Why wouldn’t Dream just leave him alone? A small sob left his lips as he curled further in on himself, pulling his pillow over his head. He just wanted to be free of Dream.

\---

Days passed and Tubbo refused to leave his room. He sent Sqeeks away and locked his door. He knew his friends would take care of his pet while he locked himself away, so he wasn’t worried.

Tommy and Ranboo, however, were very worried. When Tubbo first refused to leave his room, they figured that maybe the oldest just wanted to sleep in, but as time passed, and day became night, they realized that wasn’t the case. They had talked about it together, unsure of what really caused the issue. They discussed his odd behaviour the day before but nothing made sense. Tommy suggested that maybe he was, “Going through his emo phase” or “villain arc”, but Ranboo shot those theories down really quick. 

They had left food at Tubbo's door every meal, and tried to speak to him. Tommy told him about his flying achievements, and Ranboo spoke about all the new things he learned that day, but neither of them ever got a response. It wasn’t until the third day of silence that they decided to stage an intervention. Whatever Tubbo was going through, they wouldn’t let him do it alone. He wasn’t taking the food from outside his door, and who knew if he was even sleeping or staying hydrated. Tommy and Ranboo didn’t want to see their friend hurting silently anymore.

It was midafternoon when Tubbo’s door got broken down. He was sitting silently on his bed just staring out of his window, when he heard the crash and looked over, startled. Tommy and Ranboo were both standing in his now broken doorway. Ranboo looked a little guilty and Tommy was wearing his signature shit-eating grin. “Uh, hi…?” Tubbo spoke, his voice raspy from disuse.

Tommy’s smile slipped away and was replaced by a frown. “Hello there, Big T.” He spoke, his voice just as loud as ever, despite the sad look on his face.

“Why did you break down my door?”

Ranboo rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, before looking down to his feet. “This is- We uh-”

“We planned an intervention. This is an intervention, bitch. Get intervened.” Tommy replied as he noticed Ranboo struggling with his words. 

Tubbo was confused. An intervention? For what? He was just staying in his room.

**_Probably gonna kick you out._**

Tubbo shook his head, ignoring the thought as best he could. They wouldn’t do that. Surely not. Tommy and Ranboo are his best friends, they wouldn’t just kick him out with no place to go. “Why?

“You haven’t left your room in days, Tubbo.” Ranboo answered, his arms crossed in front of his chest as he entered further into the room. “You haven’t eaten or drank anything in days. You’re gonna kill yourself if you keep this up.”

**_You should kill them, first._ **

He tried to push the voice away. To banish it to the darkest depths of his brain, but nothing ever seemed to work. “Oh..” He muttered.

“That’s it?” Tommy asked, his face hardening as he looked at Tubbo. 

**_Start with the loud mouth._**

“What?” Tubbo wasn’t sure who he was talking to.

“You scared us, and that's all you have to say!? Oh?!” Tommy huffed, he was trying not to yell. He didn’t mean to be so angry, he didn’t want to be angry.

**_He only carries a stone sword. You could just stab him with your diamond one right now, and he wouldn’t be able to do anything._**

“Tommy I think you should calm down.” Ranboo muttered, but Tubbo wasn’t paying attention to them anymore. He couldn’t make out what Tommy said in response, or what either of them had said after that. 

**_His weak spot is his wings, just hit him there._**

Tubbo frantically shook his head. Why wouldn’t Dream just leave him alone? His eyes were beginning to water, but he didn’t have the energy to fight back the tears.

**_Do it._**

It was quiet for a moment, before he heard the voices again. They sounded closer and calmer, but he didn’t care. He needed them to shut up. They were quiet, but so _loud_ , and Tubbo couldn’t breathe. He pulled his hands over his ears, trying to block them out, and he pulled his knees up to his chest.

**_Make him suffer just like Wilbur._**

“SHUT UP!” He screamed, startling Tommy and Ranboo who were just trying to help. “Just shut up!”

**_Kill him._ **

“Get out of my head!” 

**_Kill him._ **

“Fuck you, Dream!”

**_Kill him._ **

They froze.

“Tubbo?” Tommy whispered, his voice breaking. It was like his mood did a complete 180 at the mention of Dream. He froze and stared at his best friend with wide eyes. “Tubbo, talk to us.”

Tubbo looked back, his eyes wide and his face was full of terror. He was shaking and his hands were still covering his ears. Even as Ranboo took cautious steps forward, he stayed still.

Tubbo didn’t want them to get near, but he couldn’t move. He was frozen in place as fear laced his being. The voice grew oddly silent as Ranboo crept closer. He stayed in his spot as the enderman hybrid knelt down next to his shaking form, and placed a hand on Tubbos shoulder.

“Tubbo, listen to me.” The tall boy spoke. His voice was soft. Much softer than the one intruding in everyone of his thoughts for the past few days. Tubbo watched him carefully, but nodded his head anyway. “You need to breathe.”

Was he not breathing? 

Only then did Tubbo realize how rapid his breaths were coming out. Only then did he notice how fast his chest was rising and falling, and how he could hear his own heartbeat in his ears. It made him panic more, but Ranboo was quick to catch on, and move his hand from Tubbos shoulder and to the side of his face.

_“Breathe.”_

It was hard, but he tried. One deep breath led to another, and he could no longer hear his heart in his ears. Instead he could hear Ranboo counting. In for four. Hold for seven. Out for eight. He did as he was told, following Ranboos directions. After what felt like hours, breathing came a little bit easier to him. His laboured breaths were no more, and he could fully concentrate on his friend in front of him.

Tubbo reached his hand up slowly and shakily to place it on top of Ranboos, before jumping forward and burying his face into his chest. His sobs were loud and heartbreaking. 

At first, Ranboo was taken back, and he looked to Tommy for assurance, and the boy only nodded. Slowly, he placed his hands around Tubbos back, hoping to give the shorter boy enough comfort to calm down.

The sun had begun to set when Tubbo finally pulled away from the hug, wiping his eyes. “I’m sorry.” He muttered under his breath, feeling bad for crying on the boy who is quite literally, allergic to tears.

Ranboo was quick to reassure him that it was more than okay however, and that he wasn’t hurt at all. Tubbo wanted to argue, but instead kept his mouth shut. He was exhausted, and just wanted to sleep this all off like some big nightmare.

“Tubbo.” Tommy spoke up from where he sat by the door. He was looking away from them at first, but when he turned his head, Tubbo could see the tear stains on his cheeks. “What _was_ that?”

Tubbo wanted nothing more than to not talk about it. He had been doing so well for months- keeping the voice to himself- and he ruined everything in a matter of minutes. He just wanted to go to sleep and hope they would forget everything by morning, but the look in Tommy’s eyes conveyed enough. He knew he wasn’t going to get out of this one. 

He sighed before speaking, “I uh- Since we left the Greater SMP, I’ve been hearing this voice…” Ranboo backed up a little to sit more comfortably while he explained. “It’s not him- I know it's not, but it sounds just like Dream.” Tommy once again stiffened at the name, and Tubbo sent him an apologetic look. “I kept it to myself since we left, I don’t know why it bothered me so much today that I broke down like that.”

Tubbo felt pathetic, and he let a few more stray tears fall away from his eyes as the room grew silent. Ranboo let his words soak in for a moment, before speaking up, “What does it say?”

“Pardon?”

“What does the voice say?” Ranboo repeated. He bit at the inside of his cheek before continuing. “Why did you keep it from us, Tubbo. We could have helped you.”

“I didn’t want to worry you.” The brunet explained, looking down. “You both have your own things to worry about, I didn’t want to add to that list.” His hand found his way to the bottom of his shirt, and he began to pick at the seams. “But it's okay! I can handle it!”

“You didn’t answer the question Tubbo.” Tommy spoke up, his voice wavering slightly.

The short boy nodded his head in understanding. “He’s mostly telling me what to do. When we were out watching you fly for the first time- When I was sitting with Ranboo, he said to- to stab him. And that night- When we were talking, Tommy. He said- He said to cut off your wings.” Tubbo took a chance then and looked up. Both of his friends were staring at him with wide, teary eyes, and he hated it. “And when you guys were just trying to help. He told me to kill you.” His voice cracked as he said it, but he quickly spoke, “But don’t worry, I never do what he tells me! I won’t ever let him control me again.”

“Never?” Ranboo asked, almost disbelieving, but he trusted his friend. 

Tubbo nodded his head.

“So why haven’t you left your room?”

Tubbo froze for a moment, before speaking. “Because he said to leave it.”

Tommy sucked in a sharp breath before turning to him with an almost hurt look on his face. “Is that why you don’t eat? Because the fucking voice in your head is telling you _to_ eat?” Tubbo nodded his head, and the blond let out a cry of disbelief while throwing his hands up. “Why?!”

“Because I don’t want to be controlled by him anymore!”

“But you’re not! Tubbo it’s a voice in your fuckin’ head!” Tommy wanted to cry. His best friend was practically starving himself because of a voice in his head that sounded like his abuser. All because he didn’t want to do what he said anymore. 

The more Tommy thought about it the more he was just inclined to punch something. Ranboo however, pulled Tubbo in for another hug. This time it was tighter, and he was the one crying, even if it hurt him to do so. “Tubbo-” He spoke, his voice breaking, “You can’t do that.” 

The brunet stayed silent as his friends cried for him. Ranboo’s hug was tight but he made no effort to fight it. He listened as Ranboos voice came out in hushed sobs, “I’m sorry that we didn’t notice sooner, but please stop doing that. We can help you now, but you can’t not care about your health.”

Sometime during Ranboo’s speaking, he had begun to cry again. He nodded his head along to his friend, as he explained that he had to think harder about putting his health first. Ranboo tried to explain that while yes, he can ignore the voice all he wanted, he still needed to know when not to ignore it. Tubbo knew he was right, so he kept silent. 

Tommy slowly inched away from the doorframe and closer to the hugging boys, and placed his hands on their shoulders to show his support. “Please Tubbo,” He sniffled, “Don’t hurt yourself like this anymore. You’re my best friend and I don’t wanna lose you because you kept making dumb decisions.”

“Please tell us from now on whenever it gets really bad. We want to help you.”

\---

That night was hard for all of them. 

Tubbo fell asleep first, exhaustion finally setting in after half an hour of sitting and crying together. After tucking him into bed, Ranboo and Tommy went their separate ways to their own rooms. Each one of them had a rather restless night, and by morning both Tommy and Ranboo had somehow made their way to the floor and Tubbos room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I truly apologize for the delay.  
> This past week has been extremely hectic for me.  
> My dog got sick, and I had to spend a lot of time taking care of him, and helping him get better.  
> Then my family got a bunch of chickens and ducks to add to out coop.  
> Then to top it all off I celebrated my birthday this past weekend!  
> So my life was truly a mess this past week, and I hope the next chapter or two can be out sooner than this one was.
> 
> Either way, I sincerely hope that you enjoyed this chapter!  
> I am kind of proud of it!  
> Lemme know in the comments, and maybe thing about leaving a kudos if you liked it!  
> I love you all, and thank you for your patience!  
> Stay safe!!! <3  
> Word count: 4242


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